JOE'S "CONCESSION" | 2006-01-10
In response to my "Joe Admits Defeat" Joe writes,
Absolutely, Bob! I admit defeat. The reason for this is because you are a winner. A man among men as the lion is among beasts. Everybody knows you're a winner. Nobody denies that. Notice how I've even learned to use the words "everybody" and "nobody" just like you do. What is it they say? There's no compliment like imitation. Something like that, I think. I like that headline "Joe Admits Defeat!" Ha! Ha! I thought that was very funny. Hell, I didn't even know I was in a contest. But I'll admit defeat anyway.
Oh, yes. Now I remember. You were pleading for someone to comment on what it was you were saying and I caved in and commented. I was defeated by your outstanding ability to persuade. Yes, Bob, I stand utterly defeated in your awesome presence. They just don't make 'em like you anymore.
Comment by joe rorke
MY REPLY:
A little while back someone (I'll look it up) corrected me factually and in detail about my contention that Hitler destroyed himself by declaing war on the United States. Reading what he wrote I concluded he was probably right.
So what did I do about this catastrophe of getting caught with my pants down? How did I reply?
I didn't.
My piece consisted entirely of repeating his comment, complete and in the body of Bob's Blog. I do not wake up at night crying, "Oh, God, he was right and I was WRONG!"
For a lot of people, ideas seem to come in two flavors, 1) Those that make me look good and 2) Those that make me look bad.
While I do not always practice what I preach, I LIKE to think that, for me, ideas come in two flavors: 1) right and 2) wrong.
Another thing I just preached below was that a person who does not either 1) limit his use of the words lie or liar to real cases or 2) does not follow it up when he does is a person whose word is no good.
Neither Joe nor I admit defeat to be diplomatic. Like lie and liar, we both know that admitting you are wrong is a big deal.
So when one of us admits he is wrong, just as when one of us used the word lie, it carries a lot of punch.
But if what you say carries a lot of punch because you do it seldom and only when you mean it, you just have to say it. That is all the punch you need.
Exactly the same thing is true of apologies. There is an old saying people have forgotten, "A gentleman's apology is ALWAYS accepted.
Joe did not apologize. He had nothing to apologize FOR. But again, "A gentleman's apology is ALWAYS acccepted" falls into the same category as saying the other guy's argument is stronger than yours.
When a gentleman offers an apology, it is the grossest, trashiest kind of insult if the response is, "Well, that's not enough. I'm not sure you really MEAN it."
When Joe or I say we are wrong, one sentence will do it. If someone says they are wrong and you expect them to say more, you are refusing to accept them at their word.
So Joe said he has decided, for the time being, that I was right and he was wrong on a point of argument.
In one sentence.
That was trhe end of that discussion.
The rest of what Joe said was about as apologetic as a gamecock in a bad mood. The sentence was said, the old discussion was over. Joe then went on to what he had to say.
That is EXACTLY the way it should be between gentlemen. So I was proud of it.