DAVE | 2008-01-08
ME First
I enjoyed this ramble, so I hope you will.
I did change one word relating to sex. It's not that I'm prudish, it's just that I'm supposed to be teaching here, and I don't KNOW enough about sex for that.
Now I'll let Dave rave on:
I was at seminar the other day when the speaker's credentials were recited: She had a PHD in Law, a Masters in Taxation, held a CPA license and was an active member of the California bar. Everybody immediately knew there was something wrong with her. You could almost hear the groaning in the audience. She had that vicious look most serious academics get, like she never had any sex in her life ever and had no hope of getting any ever.
Having to listen to such a woman is almost like being 5 years old and being forced to sit in the pews with a suit on. The only thing you can do is sit there and dream about lobbing spit balls off the pastor's noggin.
But my favorite in America's credentialing system is listening to the announcers recite the credentials of colored ball players, the best one being, "a Bachelor's Degree in Sociology from State U".
I have never heard an announcer follow up by saying, "Why didn't they just let the poor nigger play ball?"
Do you have any idea how humiliating and hard it is to have to sit through two years of lectures by sociology professors, sufficient to enable you to get the 45 quarterly hours of distribution credits to enable you to apply for a college bachelor's degree? It's hard on the pride man, if only for the pure waste it involves.
But it is even worse because the whole experience lasts so long and does something to your brain, crippling your ability to think and giving you no hope you will ever recover. You have to have a pretty serious sports injury to be as badly injured, speaking for the long term. Then they tag that Sociology Degree to your ass and you can never get rid of it. It stays for life. They will even mention it in your obituary.
And what a punishment that is for being unable to learn algebra! Why do white people put all those damn X's and Y's there anyway? I mean, if that is the thing that's got to get answered, that thing those X's and Y's are supposed to stand for, just ask the question! Why jumble it all up and make it confusing?
White people are just plain crazy, that's all there is to it.
And being white, I will volunteer.