THE ROBERT W. WHITAKER ARCHIVE

AMBULANCE CHASING, 2006 | 2006-06-02

In almost every state there is still a law on the books against chasing ambulances.

It is literally true that young lawyers used to chase ambulances to the hospital. This was outlawed because it was unsafe and also because the public saw it tasteless for a young man to rush up to a woman who just found out her husband had been killed and start askig her questions.

We leave that to the media now.

Besides, we have MODERN ambulance chasing. Every tragedy is now immediately reported on the news, so the lawyers flock there by electronic media.

Lawyers are now an industry that dwarfs the legal "profession" in the ambulance chasing days. Today one out of every hundred men, women and children in America is a lawyer. It is estimated that their interference with producive activity costs about one million dollars a year each.

But the legal industry is tied with other industries. There is another huge set of industries made up of organizations like The Center for Science in the Public Interest and "civil rights" organizations that dig up cases for for lawyers.

Much of the content of media output is aimed at finding legal cases. Class lawsuits first require the drumming up of public indignation over tobacco. One of the funniest parts of this continuing campaign, since it is so frustrating to the media, is the century-old atempt to find something evil about caffeine.

It is amazing this crusade has failed. Since you are used to a cuppa every morning, you don't realize what a potent drug caffeine is. If you'd never had any, it would knock the hell out of you. One old Arab saying was,

"He is generous with his cofee and his opium." Your coffee was right up there with opium.

So the scouts for the ambulance chasers have been out there after caffeine since the word go. The latest blow to their campaign was the discovery that it is not only not destrutive, but coffee is the main antioxident most people consume.

The Center for Science inthe Public Interest is still spending a fortune on getting some kind

of class action against everything from coffee to tea to Coca-Cola, but so far they have failed.

The ambulance chaser scouts have been vastly in other areas, though. It is hard to find a right-winger who is not joining in the b attle against Ritalin. I remember several months when everybody agreed that the only reason a child was hyperactive was because the child consumed too much sugar, so all that admittedly powerful and addictive Ritalin was something just made up to dstroy children.

Then some serious studies were made and that absolute certainty that sugar was the only culprit went down the Memory Hole. Ambulance chasers and the media never admit they were WRONG. When they say something absurd everybody just forgets they ever said it.

That's what respectable conservatives are for.

My doctor brother may be only living person who remembers when there no such thing as "schizophrenia." It was called "the schizophrenic RESPONSE." It was a response to experiences, probably in early childhood, that a person had had. It required psychiatric therapy.

We not only know schizophrenia is genetic, we know WHICH gene contains it.

So "the schizophrenic response" is something nobody today has ever heared of. Tell the "experts" this example of how sily they were, and they will deny it ever happened. So all the lawsuits that used to include "induced schizophrenia" have also been forgotten.

The industry of scouting for ambulance chasers is bigger than the whole legal profession was not that long ago.